Eulogy for an Old Friend – Saying Goodbye to Zoetrope Virtual Studio

 

Zoetrope Studios San Francisco

No one wants to write a eulogy – since that means someone you loved has died, but you do it because you feel like honoring that person in some substantial way.

Zoe – as many of us affectionately call it – is Zoetrope.com, a Virtual Studio where we were able to submit our short stories, poems, photos, screenplays, flash fiction, and novel excerpts. There were fellow writers in each section to read and review our work, and we could read and review their work. It was the perfect symbiotic relationship because we all benefited from the experience.

The Importance of Story

Francis Ford Coppola

Zoetrope Virtual Studio was founded by Francis Ford Coppola – the filmmaking genius who knew the importance of “the story” in life and in film – as a place for people to share their work. When I started here, I was young and rough around the edges. The first story I submitted was “Gemini” – a tale about a guy and gal who are about to become lovers and then the guy discovers they are brother and sister. The story matters less than the feedback I got on it. I was so hooked after that.

Social Media Before Social Media

The funny thing was that Zoe was social media before (I believe) anyone knew that term and what social media was. I don’t believe that term was in use in the year 2000 when I joined, but now I realize that this was always a place fellow writers could be rather social with one another while helping them with their work.  

Losing an Old Friend

This month marked my 25^th year on Zoe, and it is difficult to accept that this place will no longer be here. Just as with an old friend or loved one, you don’t want to let go of them. Even though you know death is a part of life, you cannot understand how you will go on without that person.

That is what I am feeling right now. When Monday morning comes and Zoe is gone, there will be a palpable void in my life. Just as when someone you love dies, and you pick up the phone because calling them was part of your day and then you realize they are not there to take your call, I will probably go online and click the Zoe icon on my laptop to check the short story section, and it will not be there anymore.

Why I am Going to Miss Zoe

So, why am I going to miss Zoe so much? Well, the first thing that comes to mind are the people. I’ve got to know many people on Zoe better than I know some people in my in-person life. I am talking about many years of friendship that goes beyond the stories we wrote. Z-mail – the wonderful if sometimes confounding Zoe email system – allowed us to converse beyond stories. Now that will be gone, and in these last days we have been shooting Z-mails to one another exchanging contact info in hopes of keeping what we had here going.

The sad truth is that it is over. You know how when a grandparent or parent dies – the one who kept the family coming together because of their very existence – and after that person is gone the family is never the same. People stop coming for birthdays and holidays because that person was the glue that kept it all together. Zoe is a lot like that loved one who is passing on, and so too our Zoe family will scatter into the ether and chances are very good we will never hear from one another again. I suppose that’s the natural way of things.

When I Came on Board

When I first came on board there was a fellow writer named Stefan Ash who quickly connected with me. As I stumbled out of the gate as it were, Stefan kept me from falling. When I doubted myself or my stories, he found a way to encourage me and that kept me writing. When I learned that he had died, I felt as much loss as I would have had for any person I knew in my real-world life.

Now, I am not just facing the loss of one Zoe friend – it is the colossal loss of all of Zoe. Because of this site, I have workshopped many stories that I eventually turned into novels. When they were published, I always thanked the reviewers of my stories because they helped me tweak my stories to get them to a better level. I don’t know where I would have ever had that kind of support and encouragement.

I Grew Up Here

Where else can I go to find that now? Where else can I read the fine works of other writers and review them. This is a rhetorical question because I don’t think I can do this in any other place. I cannot do this anymore. I will never be as invested as I was on Zoe. I grew up here, dammit. I don’t want to love another place because – just like people – it is too damned hard when you lose them.

Thank You!

So, thank you, Mr. Coppola, for creating this place. It gave so many people an outlet for their creative work. You really anticipated what was to come, and despite Twitter/X, Facebook, Instagram, TikTok and all the rest, there has been no place greater for creative people than Zoe.

Thanks to all my fellow writers, poets, and photographers who shared their work with us. It is a very brave thing to expose your work to others. There was an opportunity for support but also pain that is inevitable when you expose that baby that you believe is as cute as a button to the world but you find out others don’t see it that way, yet at Zoe there was support to help make that baby cuter.

So, goodbye good old Zoe, my building and loan pal. We have been through thick and thin and everything in between together. I will mourn your loss and there will be a gaping hole in my heart when you are gone, but I’m brave. I’ve been through this before – too many times! I know how to not cry and keep walking like I’m ready for battle even though I crumbling inside. It’s a defense mechanism that works for me.

Rest in peace, Zoe, and as you’re going on to the great digital beyond, please go knowing that you were loved.